i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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