She said her name was "party"
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
