Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
