It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
