Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
