Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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