my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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