community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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