mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
