Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
