Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize