Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
