dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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