we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
