god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
My first STD was from a foam party
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
