what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
