I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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