i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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