I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
