Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Randomize
