Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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