I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
