Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize