Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
