No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize