So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Randomize
