I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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