I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
You need a sexual gate keeper
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
