i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
wakey wakey hands off snakey
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
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