oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize