is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
