Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
