people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
