So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
you would pick up someone in the library
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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