It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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