i may or may not be watching the land before time
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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