Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize