just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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