I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
