Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
