doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I deserve this hangover.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
