Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Randomize
