Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize