whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
