im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize