You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
