i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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