This girl is more easily done than said...
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
