glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
