I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
