yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
